Lap Chickens?

Hi ya! How's she going, eh? Nice to see you. Help yourself to a mug of freshly roasted and brewed Arabica and a virtual treat. Try an egg tart, why don't'cha? Who came first...the chicken or the police telling you you couldn't keep chickens in the apartment? Obviously, in that case, the answer is the chicken. On the subject of chickens...

The US Department of Agriculture reported recently that in four of America's largest cities -- New York, Miami, Los Angeles and Denver -- nearly one home out of 100 keeps chickens either for a fresh egg supply or as pets, giving rise to chicken services such as Backyard Poultry magazine, MyPetChicken.com and Julie Baker's Pampered Poultry store. Not really surprising considering the ethnic population in each of those cities, eh.

Among the most popular products are strap-on cloth diapers for the occasions when owners bring their darlings indoors, i.e., cuddle their "lap chickens." Also popular are "saddles" for roosters, to spare hens mating injuries -- owing to roosters' brutal horniness, sometimes costing hens most or all of their back feathers from a single encounter. Sounds as though strap-on leather diapers would be a better bet, no? Kinky!

Hey, while we're talking product names, how about ... pet pampers...or chicken depends. Got any more suggestions? Let me her them! In Bangkok, I'd wager the chicken in the backyard ratio is a lot better than 1 to 100!

See ya, eh!

Bob

PS: Words of advice...never pick up your bubblegum from a chicken coop floor!